wee ~

wanita yg cantik menurut Allah adalah :

melukis kekuatan melalui masalahnya

tersenyum di saat tertekan

tertawa di saat hati sdg menangis

tabah di saat terhina

mempesona krn memaafkan

mengasihi tanpa meminta balasan

bertambah kuat dlm doa dan pengharapan Ilahi
pengorbanan itu pahit krn syurga itu manis

~salam eid adha~

hmm.

entry aku pendek je kali ni.

'dia tk penah ucap tahniah kt aku'

kdg2 nk jgk rase ucapan tahniah dr dia.
tp tkpe la ~ tkpnah kott.

every cloud has its silver lining

i may not know, something that i did was actually wrong.
maybe it was right for my thought.
but how it will be when it comes to the sight of Allah ?
does He pleased with it ?
i frequently wondered in everything that's happening.
 it has been the food for thouhgts in these recent years.
maybe it is the way of correcting the misdoings.


there is one thing i do feared the most in my life.
it is when i'd wrongly choose the path.
that also same goes to when making decisions, hardly know what's the best.
but i also knew one thing, that is
everything happens for the best purpose. i believed in it.
He sent someone or something, it was not in vain.

instead of regretting it, i do feel grateful.

~forgive the others, accept them just the way they are,
and you'll feel better~

:')

mereka ~ 

tadi aku nampak mereka

ya Allah, rase teruja sangat tadi, terubat rindu nihh.

rase nk nanges punn ade. senyum sampai ke telinga :]

dah lame sangat tk jumpe dorg, kebetulan tadi semua ade kt situ.

teringat tahun lepas :')

.....

presently, i find it's hard for me to cope with anybody.

everyone arounds me and everyone who close to my heart.

i didn't mean to drag anything purposely.

but sometimes i can't understand why they are doing that and this.

or why these and why not those.

  it's doleful to get along with that particular thing.

maybe sometimes it's good to feel disappointed.
so that i'll know my sentiment isn't so important for them.
my feelings are made to be broken -.-


''what's the point in trying to explain how you feel ?
you know what happens. everyone acts
as if they're listening properly.
 but really, all they're doing is softening you up.
so you'll listen to what they're planning to say to you after.
and that's always : well, that's how things are, you'll get used to it"
huhh~

walaweyh ~

yeahh, done trial ! at last, after burning the midnight oil for a month.

pramerdeka ~ wee, pra je punn. haha.

its already 10.23pm and im still laying on the bed doing nothing.

lalala~ rileks2 dulu. dah malam2 nnty baru la bakor

minyak pelita. SPM is just around the corner weyh. 

tk boley rileks2 dah. eh tak, boley2.

tadi baru je ckp nk rileks kan. eh entah, ape la merepek ni heihh.

tadi last paper pyhsics, mcm ape je kann jawab.

pike nk cepat habes je, haha ape daa.

ok tadi ade jamuan badar. *tetibe msuk sal jamuan

lain kali aku tknk uruskn makanan lagi --'

seriously tknk ~ mcm la lepas ni ade lgi kann.

tk kesa la, yg penting aku mmg tknk tknk tknk.

mmg rezeki aku la tdi tu, hmm.

dah la tunggu sorg tu tk dtg2, sadisnyeee :| 

problems, please go :'(

so many things had screwed up. i dun even know how to start again.

how i wish i could push all the insincerity away.

why it has to be like this? i cant even think well right now.

it's like a fog that blurs the sane. okay, a bit harsh.

everything come up with problems.

 it came like puff, and then everything's never be the same.

ohh Allah, please grant me a little bit resilient. so i can face all this.

i have a tonnes of things to do. but these matters 

had took my passions awayy.

then i get something from my friend who said,

"i know someone who named is mar. mar that i know is a

person who is strong and determined,, she knows how to control 

her problems and handle heavy burdens. and i believed 

that she will be fine"

yess i am,, i am a person who knows 

how to hide big things from everyone's eyes.

i know how to conceale my tears in front of my friends.

forcing laughter, faking smiles.

but im not sure i could stay pretending that way this time.

Allah is my only hope. and He will always be.

today's story~zzzz

okayy aku rase hari ni muke aku betol betol 

da macam zombie.

herr, semalam langsung tk tidoq. 

buat keje sampai waktu sahur. tk boley tido masalahnye.

da tktw nk buat ape., pagi2 pegi skola, pergh~

macam mayat hidup. ade la sorang tu yg cakap 

muke aku macam zombie.

waktu addmath aku boley TERtido ! 

tk pena2 aku tido waktu ticer sarimah, huhu.

dah la tdi ramai sangat yg tk datang,, bosan betol kelas.

  baris aku tu, ade dua org je,. 

kwn aku tu pulak memang salu tido,, budak asrama kann, haha.

aku rase ticer nampak kowt ktorang tido.

yelaa, budak tk ramai. so obvious sangat lahh 

bile ade yg buat aktiviti laen.

tk tahan kowt. untung laa tk kene panggil ke depan.

ingatkan balek skola boley laa topup tido., 

tapi tk jugakk~

ttibe umi amik hari ni. klw umi yg amik,, 

memang bjalan je la aktiviti nye.

sampai je at jj a.k.a ruma kedua, terus pegi smart wonderland. 

waktu nk beli coin tu lerr akak cashier tu cakap

"dik, kt sini bdk skola tk boley main"

hadoiy, mentang mentang la aku pakai baju skola,, 

dia ingat aku ponteng ke. eei geram,

 bukannye aku mntk sedekah kt dia pn.

bayar kenn. dia tk tw ke aku suke sangat main kt situ.

lagi lagi main gendang lagu jepun uuh, best laa~

main dgn hanis, huhu sadis.

kalaw tw macam tu memang aku tuka baju dulu da tadii.

bile agak agak kaki tu da penat nak round round lgi, balek r.

dalam mind da set, balek nk terus melingkor atas katil.

tpi tk lagi~ lupe plak kene pegi salon.

haa, time kt salon ni laa aku tido., haha.

bayangkan la, aku boley nye tido time 

amoi tu tengah gunting rambut.

dia tarik tarik rambut pun aku tk sedar.

waktu dia tengah shampoo pun aku tido.

bile da habis, dia cakap "dik, bangun,, nak pegi cuci"

segan gile kowt. aku tido sampai tersengguk sengguk.

heish, terok betol. 1jam lbey spent kt situ.

then baru lahh balek~akhirnyee.

halahh, balek pn bukan terus landing. dah tk ngantokk.

hm, semoga malam ni boley la tido lena.

and mimpi indah (;

okayy the end~~

ohh camry :/

knape dgn camry ayah ?

mule mule dgr bunyik mcm nk let go. tp ptg accident woo tdi.
kt office pulakk,. yg aku tabik nye dgn ayah ni, rileks jer.

tkde mara  mara pn org yg lggar tu,. pnyabar gile.

klw aku laa, tktw ape jdi.

bile aku tanye knpe dgn kereta tu.

ayah ckp ''ade org cium buntut kereta''

cium? haha, ayah funny~ aku dgn umi yg gelabah. grrr~

biase laa perempuan.

sebel !

hm, mcm mne ye nk ckp ngn bdk sorg ni.

salu sgt anta mesej pkul12. tgh mlm plak tuu. aku rimas gilee. 

sbbkn dia, aku jdi org yg salu sgt off fon.

heih, sbb rimas. eei, mmg rimas,, 

tengok tu, da ulang byk kali. ni taukid nme nye. 

tk perlu la mesej knon nk ckp psl skola dia or plajaran.

mcm tkde org laen jer. yg suda tu suda la.

drpd aku tkde rase benci kt dia, ttbe jdi tk suke bile dia buat mcm tu.

sampai kacau kwn aku. YA ALLAH, knpe dgn kau ni.

sampai nk libatkn kwn aku, mane nye tk naik darah aku.

aku paling tk suke bile hal aku mnyusahkan org laen.

tlong la pham. bile aku ckp tk suke, means aku mmg tk suke :'(

goodbye.

i've deactivated my fb account.

for how many times? haha, countless~

and for how long? hmm, im not sure. but its for my sake of course.

and the others also. since i've hurt someone because of it.

fb had brought a lot disreputations than courtesy itself.

so gudbye~ i will not trouble you again, okayy :)

  

1st day of pra-2~~

perghh, ary ni mmg tk pna jadi dlm sejarah hidup aku la.

mlm sblum exam tido awal gilee. 9 lbey da tido.

sbb ape ? ade la sumtink jadi, buatkn aku malas nk pike.

malas nk buat pape. off fon, then tido.

pagi pagi bgon, rase mcm tk jdi pape je smlm. bagos la, tkde la sakit aty kann.

then pukul7.15 baru bukak buku at skola.

exam start pukul8.15, biology pulak. ngee~ 

mmg tk pna dbuat la oleh Maryam Nadiah sblom ni. 

maen jwb je, haha.

lepas hbes skola, buat keje at SPBT.

smpay pukul6 ptg~lame kann.

nk taw buat ape ? buat keje keje laky.

angkut almari sane sini, panjat panjat tangge.

panjat rak. memang pengalaman laa. 

penat jangan cakap la. teramat.

tapi seronok. ye, aku mmg jenis yg sgt suke buat keje.

tk kesah la pape punn. smpay teacher Ellea pggil aku 'pekerja buruh'.

adkah itu satu penghargaan utk sy ?

haha, semestinye tidakk.

nnty klaw msok bilik SPBT, yg sume cantek cantek tampal at 

dinding tu aku la yg buat. haha perasan.

ok that's all for today. *macam lahh aku update ary ary -,-
assalamualaikum~

p/s : you cant have a better tomorrow if you keep thinking

about yesterday :)

a.i.n.a

oh God, i miss them >.<

no title.

once you treat me nicely, ten times i'll treat you nicer.

but once you treat me badly, i'll treat you worse ten times than that.

conclusion : be nice please (;

endless.

exam mid year dah habis~sakit2 bahu aq dibuatnye.
kena pi urut ni. mane tidaknye, tiap malam tido tk menentu.
then at meja je la tempat aq lena.

dgn buku merata2. kelam kelibut bilik jadinye. semoga berbaloi la.

 tp still tk cukup tu.

hmm, bile da abes exam ni, rase mkin byk bnde yg tk settle.

and mkin byk bnde nk dpikirkn. these two weeks of
holiday gonna be busy and busy.

*heih, macam lahh. sume pike wayang, cuti, outing.
tk pon, melanguk dpn fb b'jam2. aq lahh tuu. 

pdhal bkn wt pape pn. jz scroll page tu ats bwh,tp tk jumpe pe yg dicarik.
okayy, buang mase. sangatt.


tp kli ni mmg byk bnde lahh nk kne wt.
 penat, lesu~ tp aq t'bace kate2 ni ;

'' penat dan letih hanya akan hilang bila tiada tanggungjawab.
dan tanggungjawab hanya akan hilang bila kita mati ''
means, selagi kite hidup, selagi tu la tggungjwb kite tkkn habes.
kalau tk, utk ape kite hdup kann ?

break the silence.

real life sometimes cant get along in your way.
in life, saying the right thing at the right moment is beyond crucial.
so crucial, in fact, that most of us start to hesitate, for fear of saying wrong thing
at the wrong time. but lately what i've began to fear more than that,
is letting the moment pass without saying anything.
maybe i've said it, but you just take it easy.
so, im done of saying those things.


looking back regretting the moment we didnt speak up. of what actually
happened, or how do we felt. when we should've said 'im sorry'.
when we didnt stand up for ourselves or someone who needed help.
this is an open letter, made up of words i didnt say
when the moment was right in front me.
written to a specific person in mind, telling what i meant to tell you in person.
to someone i forgive for what you said in front of the whole world.


words can break someone into a million pieces, but they can
also put them back together. i hope you use yours for good, because the only
words you'll regret more than ones left unsaid, are the
ones you use to unintentionally hurt someone.
what you say might be too much for some people. maybe it will come out
all wrong and you'll stutter and walk away,
 wincing as you play it all back in your head.


there is a time for silence. there is a time waiting your turn.
but if you know how do you feel, and you're so clearly know what does you need
to say, you'll know it. you deserve to look back on your life without a chorus
of resounding voices saying 'i could've, but its too late now'.
its never too late to be brand new.

   inspired by taylor <3

anda~ ye,anda lahh tu

jealous seyh nengok kau dah hepy skrg. dgn hdup baru kau.

 mane aci. aku ponn nk jugakk.

yela, dulu yeye la susa sng bsame en.
 hmm, tkpe tkpe.

tengok kau hepy, aku da boley hepy. kowt la~

aku doakn kau bahagie yaww. fullstop.

my little sister :P

yeahh, sah sah la kucing ni bukan adik aku kn. haha.

but, mostly like her~dpt barang baru, tk smpay bape minit da hancur.

kdg hilg la. heih, bak kate my mum

" mcm la bpk ko tu cop duet.''

 cmne la nk bagi bdk ni pndai jge brg. nnty da besor pndai la kowt.

nape aku ckp sal dy ni? haha, da tktaw nk ckp sal ape.

monteng.

or dlm bahase sbnr, PONTENG~ lately ni suke beno monteng. knpe ye?
new hobby~hakhak. lgpn my mum on aje kalau aku mntak cuti. that was the best.
 alaa,pegi skola ponn duduk dewan je. kantokk =,=
 drpd tido kt dewan, baik tido at uma. kann3.

hellOo (:

yeahh! first time blogging. thanks larh to my cousin,
 Cik Dida yg tkde keje tolong buadkn.
dah lame kowt blog ni terbiar tk b'penghuni. busy la kononnye.
 ahha. ha,tktaw la nk ckp pe. later lahh~